can we use this power for good instead of evil?
I saw something over at Mac’s that really punctuates what I hate about capitalism and marketing: silent tampon wrappers!
Silent tampon wrappers? Is this really a huge problem? Is there a shyness amongst women about their periods? Women can talk to each other while they’re going to the bathroom, and according to the commercials women are very open about talking about their periods. There’s just a problem with the sound of the wrapper?!
Mac suggests silent cellophane for movie candy packages. I would back that. But noooooo, that would be useful.
Why is it that companies are constantly shoving new or improved (or new AND improved…figure that one out) products down our throats when the products we have work just fine?
Do I need 4 blades on my razor? Just 3 months ago 3 blades was the best there was; it still is according to 50% of the commercials out there. But wait! How about we put a battery in the razor! Why do we need a device that combines a vibrator and a razor, and why do I need to pay $12 to put it near my neck!?!
Was there a problem with razors? Are there tons of customers out there emailing and sending letters to manufactures?
What’s wrong with the toothbrush? Why is there a new type of toothbrush on the shelf every time I go to the store? If the new type of toothbrush was any good, I would be able to find it the next time I go to the store. But, noooooo, if I like it it will be discontinued. Are they finding that the new brushs are causing more tooth decay? No? Then why discontinue it? Oh, maybe it’s because there are TOO MANY FREAKIN CHOICES!?!?!
No-stick aluminum foil? I have only ever had melted cheese stick to aluminum foil…is that really a big problem?
35 different versions of the same shampoo, each with one different herb in it…do you really think one herb, or 25 herbs, is going to clean your hair better? Smell better, maybe, but actually clean it better?
Why is it that I can’t find a buy spray that actually stops bugs from biting me, but I have 45 freakin options of toliet paper and 17 different ways to blow my nose and 10 different types of dishwashing detergents? Toliet paper: ok, make it thick enough to keep it from ripping. Isn’t getting eaten alive by bugs most of a global annoyance than spots on your glassware? What about an irritated nose during a cold? There are countries that don’t have working plumbing, and people die from insect-borne diseases, so can’t we focus our product improvement skills on making a bug spray that fucking works!?!
I’ve asked it before, what’s up with everything being orange? Was our ability to clean so terribly hampered before this miracle of modern development: adding a citrus smell to the noxious fumes of Windex? The next big cleaning wave? Apples. Or maybe something low carb!! Coming soon: Low Carb Windex.
You laugh…but it could happen…
June 21st, 2004 at 7:06 pm
TMI coming up:
When I was in high school, a freshman in fact, I was in the locker room and opening a tampon in the bathroom when one of the senior girls heard me do it and announced to the entire locker room that I was “on the rag” and I was teased and taunted for the rest of the week. So hell ya…I LOVE the thought of silent wrappers….if just for the fact that poor girls in that awkward in their stage don’t have to go through what I did. So THERE>
August 11th, 2004 at 9:12 am
Speaking of feminane hygeine products, does the marketing for these products have to represent all women as retarded. I mean seriously, every commercial i see has some giggly female on it that represents the appitamy of all the that is wrong with women today. I don’t mean to say women are stupid but in the way they allow all these commercials to brainwash them, it makes me wonder. Any guy who has had a remotly intelligent girlfriend can relate to the fact that girls say some pretty dumb shit sometimes. it makes you wonder where it comes from, well i think it comes from these stupid fuckin commercials that draw women in to idolize total braindead bimbos. “i wanna be like her. pretty and dumb as a box of rocks…or dumber.” “Lets go on a shopping spree.” Thats just the kind of materialistic woman every man wants…Right! When that can empty your wallet in 5 seconds flat and buy 7 shirts. Personnally, i hate T.V. To me its just a method of mind numbing so we all bounce around like lemmings serving our purpose and then diing. Well what can ya do no one will ever give up their beloved televisions, so they must like being idiots. Don’t get me wrong, there is useful information to be found on television, but the bad out weighs the good by a phenominal amount. How many more products do we need that are practically useless and that we only want because we’re jelous of the idiots that can afford them. How about this, lets just empty our wallets into the trash can. I would but mines already empty.